Friday, August 1, 2008

the waiting game

as days go by, i realize
that i just have to learn to find
contentment in the waiting game
to cherish the way he says my name
just learning to be patient at last
the time goes slow, the feelings grow fast
and i love him more with every day
i love it when he just calls to say
that he loves me, init, simple as
calls me his missus and all that jazz
and im forever faithful; HIS
i spend the moments yearning for his kiss
buts its worth the wait and worth the tears
to know that he's mine for the rest of our years.

Monday, April 28, 2008

insanity

and she knows that she is wrong
each time she questions him
but like the melody of a song
she grasps it on a whim
because a fear will plague her
no matter what he said
and his answer seem so vague to her
they tug upon her dread
paranoia clings to her lashes
like a child to his teddy
and everytime this pain relapses
she swears that she wasn't ready

shes not a clown shes not a clown
she cries hot tears in which she drowns
all for the love of a wisp of air
all for the hope that he'll meet her there

and she knows that she is wrong
each time she holds her breath
hoping that he'll go along
and follow her to death
yet when he puts her in her place
and tells her that he is right
its nearly as warm as an embrace
with words, he holds her tight
because inside shes come to know
that she does not deserve
a man so patient, without woe
and fears his love may swerve
toward a better fitted match
a beauty beyond compare
and her heart, she cannot patch
no, she cannot repair

shes not a doll shes not a doll
shes dug the hole in which she falls
because her love is so robust
because she fears her hope is dust

and she knows that she is wrong
each time she sheds a tear
for his arms are where she belongs
she longs to be held near
yet the distance seems to grow
each moment she does wait
the moments tick tick tick so slow
they cause her to debate
why does this man take his time
to make his way to her
'he promised to be only mine
to make me feel secure'
but she waits, he does not come
and alone she starts to cry
beating her head like a drum
asking, why why why

shes not a doll, shes not a clown
her world is spinning upside down
because her lover stays away
and haunts her night and taunts her day.

paranoia

like a bird without a song
everything just feels all wrong
and i just cant seem to find
all those things you claimed were mine
if i could look into your eyes and see
that you were real and you loved me
i know that i would then feel safe
and know that i was not replaced
so far away, the distance grows
i wait, but for how long, who knows
i try to trust and not to break
to never think your love is fake
but my mind, time after time
puts me in this awful bind
a fool i never wish to be
so never make one out of me
just be true and never lie
tell the truth and justify
when i ask you something rare
answer me and love me bare
because you know that im afraid
while i wait, you're getting laid
silly as you seem to say
i fear this each and every day
so hold me tight and whisper clear
only you, forever dear.

Thursday, February 28, 2008

my best friend

there once was a girl named emily grab
who gathered up all of her things in a bag
and traveled the world to never look back
discovering things that we'd never forget
she pushed every limit and crossed every line
you said dont you take it, she said but its mine
and took it and tamed it and kept it in hand
the only girl capable of trapping the sand
all the things you said she couldnt, she did
call her a legend or call her a kid
she'll call you a fool and prove it, its true
then turn around and paint pictures with glue
terrible wonderful new and fantastic
colour her cruel or paint her drastic
she is what she is and does what she wishes
she flies with the eagles, swims with the fishes
dont blink your eyes, dont dare to miss it
keep watch on that girl, dont you ever dismiss it
for something quite plain as the sound of her name
she'll use her writings to gain such wide fame
making extraordiary out of the drab
this is my best friend, miss emily grab

boxing gloves

there is a space upon my heart
on which a name resides
in pretty scrawl with tightened curl
roots tangled deep inside
it flowers out with healing strands
stretched over all past wounds
like the touch of soothing hands
or the lingering of sweet tunes
slowly it does spread its touch
subtle, patient, tender
scars that once ached so much
are healed in sweet surrender
each moment passes with a beat
bespeaks a heart that's yearning
to be held, to be complete
to have a page worth turning
there was a space upon my heart
just waiting to be claimed
to be touched, not torn apart
afraid of being tamed
you came along without a pen
not knowing what to do
when you failed, you tried again
you managed to break through
without a pen you could not write
your name upon my soul
so you carved with all your might
and once done, made me whole
rigid lines, deeply sown
your name wont fade away
i am yours, as sayings go
until my dying day

Tuesday, February 19, 2008

breathing fire.

you can think what you will
and do what you may
but im not gonna spill
no, im not gonna say
whats on my mind
or whats bothering me
just give me time
just let me be
alone with these demons
because im paying the cost
to have all my freedom
a prisoner, lost
and its worth the wait
im willing to give
my heart for this fate
for as long as i live
and i wont let you in
no i wont share this load
im keeping this sin
im taking this road
and where it may lead
im going to find
though you dont believe
and you want to rewind
i wont think of the past
no i wont turn my head
and this love will last
til the day i lay dead.

Sunday, February 17, 2008

another broken syllable

here I sit again in tears
festering in these silly fears
simply wishing you were here
that to your heart, you'd hold me near

though I know that I am blind
still these fears I come to find
swirl and twirl inside my mind
around my heart they seem to wind

until I'm strangled by my stress
left to only second guess
and I know I must confess
my faith in you, it wavers, yes

oh, my darling, can't you see
i lose myself to misery
i fear that there's no gaurantee
yet to my heart, you hold the key

know its fragile in your hand
someday try to understand
my love for you was quite unplanned
though it hurts, it still is grand

to love at all is a scary thing
not knowing what it stands to bring
make me cry or make me sing
i give to you my everything

reassure my aching heart
that someday our lives will start
and we won't have need to part
to know this path I take is smart

in your arms, make me secure
in your love, be always pure
your mere touch becomes my cure
and I know we will endure

so, please forgive me for my doubt
because I cannot do without
i only fear the loss of you
and that, Hayden, is why I'm blue.